Captain Gathera

By Anthony Muchoki , originally published 2005.

Captain Gathera elicited jeers and laugher in Kariba Town, in the central parts of Randiera state where he lived. He was the town’s griot and madman. Often even the people who hated him found themselves, when struck with problems seeking out his advice. Any public ceremony like burial or wedding would not be complete without his presence. He was what Professor Four K used to call the necessary devil. The two at times found solace in each other, as they were the butt of all the jokes in the town.

Captain Gathera lived with his trademark Airopi, which was a four stringed instrument. He used to sleep, it was rumoured, holding the small guitar-like device in his right hand. At no one time did I ever see him without the tool. After all, despite being over seventy years old, he had never been married. He lived in a one-roomed hovel in the outskirts of Kariba Town.

He is the only man whose house was atop a tree, like a bird, that I ever saw with my eyes.  The house was fixed atop a murambo tree. To the Kipioo tribe mates, who were the majority residents of the town, they considered murambo trees special. This was because when Ikiori, the great God created Randiera country and gave it to Kipioo people, he told them that it would be forever their sign of life. Only prophets were permitted to cut down murambo trees. You can bet Captain Gathera was never a prophet but he used to cook with firewood from the holy tree. Nothing ever happened to him. A woman who had imitated him, and used firewood from the tree to cook supper got a surprise of her life.  All her children kicked the bucket after eating the food she had prepared.  From then onward nobody ever tried to imitate Captain Gathera again. It was rumoured, when Randiera gained independence, he was recruited in the army and rose to be a captain.  My father told??? he never spoke to anybody about his army days. The oldest people in town knew of the history of his childhood only. As a teenager he disappeared for over 40 years and came to Kariba back in tatters.

 His voice as he sang on occasions accompanied by Airopi was the best music Kariba Town knew. If one ever wronged him, he would compose a scathing number on him. I remember there was a man who called him a madman openly. The man was the latest town tycoon aspiring to become the town mayor in the next election. Captain Gathera did not utter a word in protest but the following day from as early as six in the morning he was in the town square. He had composed a song titled “Karimu” the foolish one:

Karimu the foolish one

The boy who grew up in jiggers

Called me lunatic

Karimu the foolish one

The boy who grew up in jiggers

Now calls elder’s names

Karimu the foolish one

The boy who grew up in jiggers

He is a fool

Karimu the foolish one

The boy who grew up in jiggers

With his billions is still a porcupine

Karimu the foolish one

The boy who grew up in jiggers

Karimu the fool of the fools…

The man in the town became known simply as “Karimu.”  Up to now, I cannot recall his real name. Children, men and women all would call him Karimu. For the next one year “Karimu the foolish one,” was the most popular song in the town. The man took Captain Gathera to court for defamation, but lost the case. The court ruled there was no direct reference to his name in the song; it was just an allegory, which was suitable for those who abuse others. Karimu left the court in shame as people sung loudly the song he hated with all his heart. For a moment he wanted to forgo his ambitions to become a mayor as the song had made him so unpopular. The mayoral elections were just around the corner.

He convinced himself that a madman should not force him out of his plans. Unlike, Professor Four K he was never educated. His mother bore him out of wedlock. She brought him up in the streets of Randiera City in the worst destitution possible. He had watched his mother in tatters die of malaria in the streets, when he was 10 years old, just because they did not have even a single cent to buy anti-malaria tablets. And he had risen from the terrible destitution to become the richest person in Kariba Town. Without any formal education, his brutal personality and fearlessness ensured he pushed his way up the ladder of business world.  He was a rising realtor holding large tracks of lands in the outskirts of Kariba Town. It was romoured that he was 80 per cent shareholder of the tallest building in Randiera City- Alpa Towers. 

He was only four years old in Kariba Town. He had come here for political reasons. It was said most of his money, he had made it in the big city but was paranoid when mingling with the city’s educated folks whom he distrusted. He had preferred our town because educated people were very few and all of them aspired to go and live in Randiera City. He always give the example of Professor 4K to show that book knowledge could not be translated into hard cash.

“If you had the opportunity what would you have studied?” I once asked him. He looked up in the sky for a very long time.

“My boy, I would have studied law or accounts.  The two are the only professions that I know, where one can steal with a stroke of a pen and get away with it,” he had told me.

Okay, I did not want to become a thief when I grew up, but out of his words is where my ambition to become a lawyer sprung.  In a way, although the whole town disliked Karimu he was my hero. I told him that if I were 18 years, the age required for one to vote, I could have voted for him. That day he was very happy. He assured me that he was going to do everything possible to win the seat. I tried to convince him to make peace with Captain Gathera. He told me a big no. In the town any one who had ever disagreed with Captain Gathera ended up in misery. I tried to give him sordid examples of men and women who had to emigrate from Kariba Town after they openly called him a madman. The captain only allowed one person to call him a madman openly: Himself. He used to start all his presentations with the words, “Here comes Kariba Town only madman…”

I was the only person in Kariba Town who was friendly with Karimu. I would go to his big hardware shop, and I was allowed to sit inside and even play with his moneybox. He sometimes used to send me to the bank to deposit money for him. I became the smartest boy in the town. This was for the reason that every time he went to the big city he always brought me new clothes. And because my father could not provide some of the provisions he was giving me, he left our friendship alone. When the two-months of campaign was announced before elections, Karimu started in earnest to solicit for votes. He told me he was going to buy all the voters. In the subsequent days, he made it known that there was money flowing for those who were willing to vote for him. All the town thugs and prostitutes, men and women who answered to the call of money as the first god, became his ardent followers. His campaign manager, within one month, had built a modern 10-roomed bungalow in place where his mud hut was located previously. Everybody around Captain Gathera smelled rich. The second month of the campaigns was my school holiday. Karimu asked me to join him for a trip to Randiera City. This time he was not going to use his sleek Mercedes Benz. He hired a car.

On the way, I told him how lucky he was because Captain Gathera for the last three months since the end of the case had been sick. I told him that was the only man who would have stopped him from winning the seat, and reluctantly he agreed.

“Thank gods, the devil has put him in his place,” he told me.

The visit with him to the city was my first ever. We went to Randiera International Airport, where he told me he was hiring a helicopter for three weeks to help him make a statement in his campaign.   I had never seen an aeroplane at a close range and I was excited. I would be the first boy to land with a helicopter in Kariba Town. Karimu must be damn rich, I thought. My father had told me that no one had ever landed with an aeroplane in Kariba Town, even Professor Four K when he was a billionaire. The aeroplane flew all the way and circled Kariba Town for over one hour. Karimu wanted everyone to see the machine. As it flew over the town, he was speaking using a loud speaker how he was going to make Kariba, the richest town in Randiera. 

“I will bring you development, factories and more food than you can eat… I will make sure all of you have money flowing in your pockets…when you make me your mayor for one whole year I promise one beer daily for every adult man who will vote for me for about one year… for women there will be 50,000/- gift for all mothers every month year round…” he went on and on. I was really enjoying myself. He even allowed me to talk in the loudspeaker and greet my friends while I was airborne. 

Then before the plane came down, he directed the pilot to circle the tree, which housed Captain Gathera who was sick. I tried to dissuade him but he said he was not afraid of a madman. The plane circled the tree about four times. I closed my eyes. I was later told the Captain in fright climbed down the tree without his legendry Airopi. He was running away covering his head like a frightened chicken.  Karimu roared in the microphone with laughter.

“So even madmen can be afraid?” he asked in the loud speaker rhetorically. When the Captain heard his voice he stopped running away and looked up to the skies as we headed to the town’s depleted stadium, which was used for over last 60 years during the colonial rule. Captain Gathera climbed back to his house and took his Airopi, then headed to town. For us by the time we landed at the stadium almost everyone was there to see us. I became a celebrity. Karimu’s driver collected him and drove him home. The Captain was shocked by the plane’s roar back to good health.

My father advised me to go and visit the Captain secretly and apologize for being in the plane that was used to mock him. When I went to him, he did not mistreat me or speak any bad word about me.

“My boy, I don’t have a grudge against you. I don’t.    All I request you is to respect your elders and the wisdom of the ages that Ikiori, gave Kipioo people,” he told me. He instructed me to see him two days before the election without Karimu’s knowledge. In fact, he praised my friendship with Karimu, and said he thought I was not only the smartest boy in town but also the brainiest. I felt rather proud that day. I did not want to be in the bad books of Captain Gathera.

The election fever had hit the town to the roofs. There were four other contenders for the mayoral seat. Trying to compete with Karimu to dish out free money, three of them became bankrupt even before the elections were done. Kariba Town during the electioneering period must have been the cleanest town in the whole country. Karimu was paying idlers money to keep it clean. He gave shop owners money so that they could paint their shops. He wanted to turn the town into a model kingdom. Karimu became the most generous figure with anyone with a voting card visiting him getting free money. It was like he was a river of money, without a beginning or an end. And because I was with him most of the time, I had become his informal accountant. He would direct me on how to share his money. He gave me some cash everyday for my upkeep. I gave it all to my father to keep for me. The town had gone quiet a bit as Captain Gathera was not taking any invitation. Then I visited him as agreed two days before the d-day. 

“I am going to make your man to fail. He has to go back to where he came from. He is not a child of Professor Four K. All this land once belonged to the old professor. So my boy, start preparing for a life without your foolish Karimu,” he told me.

One day to elections, Captain Gathera was running up and down singing about the madman who came to Kariba four years ago, and thought he could own it with his money.

Those who elect Karimu

May their hands fall

In leprosy ho ho ho

Those who elect Karimu

May their balls

Disappear ho ho ho

Those who elect Karimu

May Ikiori

Curse them ho ho ho

For Karimu is an evil spirit

Cursed by Ikiori

Karimu the foolish one

The following day, he went on and on singing the same song everywhere in the election posts. When the votes were counted later at night only two people had voted for Karimu. The following day two village drunkards who had voted for him ran amok. Karimu flew the same night by foot from Kariba Town. He never came back. Captain Gathera took his Mercedes Benz and removed its parts to decorate his house at the tree. The helicopter he had hired was left in the stadium and its remains are still there to date.  One day I hope I will meet Karimu, for he was my hero.